Figure I'll pick up a few things from Walmart.
So to look the part, I change out my collared shirt and slacks for ninja turtles pajama pants, sandals and a Coors Light t-shirt.
I make sure to smoke a few cigarettes on the way too, to class up my breath.
Now I'm strolling down an aisle, selecting a case of Monster, when I see a middle-aged woman browsing the same aisle a few feet away.
I continue on, this time in the cereal aisle. There she is again.
Loading up on Pop Tarts (keeping it real with Strawberry), I ignore her as we pass by each other.
Two aisles over, I'm pondering over soups to myself.
Then I hear her squeaky cart approaching and there she is again, appearing at the opposite end.
How many times do you pass the same stranger without saying hello?
"Whoa wait," I say, hands out, "Where have I seen you before?"
"Oh I remember! I love what you've done with your hair since the soda aisle."
And to my surprise, she whips up a dry wit.
"Why thank you, dyed it myself," she bats her eyes, "You must have good taste in groceries."
We both look in my cart, filled with very blatant guy-in-his-twenties type products and laugh.
"Make sure you get all your vitamins, young man!" she wags a finger towards the 6-pack of Blue Moon, and exits my aisle, never to be randomly seen again.